Week 11: Small Victories

Today started like every other morning I need to run… racing the clock.

I rushed to get Diem on the potty so we can continue on this “no accident” streak, I made  breakfast, got my kids to EAT the breakfast which takes an old priest and a young priest as it is, dressed all of us, stretched and hit the road by 7am so we can beat either the heat or the rain… because one of them always threatens us.

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IMG_5783I set out for 4 miles and did 5 which ultimately I’m happy for because I got, yet another, rejection email upon my return home.  Picture yourself sweating profusely and hearing your email ping, you go over to read it, careful not to pour sweat onto your laptop and see the word “Unfortunately” pop out at you like an obnoxious cartoon character.

That makes 4 out of 15 so far!  And I haven’t cried yet so that’s a success in itself.  I also got a beautiful review on We All Fall Down this morning so that pretty much balances out the suckiness of an agent not feeling like The Quiet Ones is a good “fit”.  My endorphins are still coursing happily through my veins so I won’t let this get me down…

 

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We are officially 80 days away from the Houston Half Marathon and I was able to run 7 miles last weekend (which is my longest distance yet!  Whoop Whoop!) and I’m hoping to get between 7.5-8 miles this weekend.  I’m working toward at least 10 miles by race day with the idea in mind I’ll be so in the zone by then that the last 3 will be a breeze.  Or I’ll be too numb to care.

I posted a little bit about that run on Instagram but I wanted to share here that I am noticing when I do a little bit of fasting the night before I run, I don’t feel as heavy and I’m able to breeze through MUCH easier.

I am still at a pitiful pace but my kids are heavy AF and I’m trying to add mileage that I’ve never done before so I’m cutting myself some slack there.

HOWEVER, the fasting…

My husband is a bit more rigid when he does it but for women they recommend fasting 12-14 hours rather than the 16 like men… body chemistry or hormones… I don’t know the science of it, I just am listening to the Google Gurus.

I have to eat before I run/exercise or I’ll get low blood sugar, so I prefer to fast in the evening.  I typically do it 3-4 days in a row, then eat at normal times for a couple days, then “fast” again.  I’ll eat between 6/6:30pm to 4/4:30 am and nothing else until morning.  I prefer going to bed without a full belly anyway so this isn’t a huge shift for me.  I feel like I have more energy when I do this, mental clarity and overall less “heavy” when I’m trying to run longer distances.  It also helped me lose a couple extra pounds I’ve been holding onto with the stress eating.

I cut back on sugars for a couple weeks and bad snacking as well- until day before yesterday when I inhaled 2 bags of caramel corn… it was amazing but I felt like a bag of crap the whole next day… lesson learned.

I’m happy with my runs the last couple of weeks and with our visit to Houston next week, I’m hoping with the extra hands, I can reach my goal since I’ll be running without pushing the girls for a week!

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With my queries out and just regular life/work stresses, it’s really nice to have these small victories (big to me small to you… or maybe big to you too… either way) and feel like SOMETHING was accomplished while I’m still working to find an agent who is willing to represent me.

In other news, Cori is about to start pre-K 4 which is just another reminder that she will be 5 soon and I’m just not emotionally prepared for that.  I don’t know how to be OK with my kids growing up and it feels like a cruel joke.  My girls are the most valuable possessions I have and I have to keep in mind that I’m not grooming them for me to keep… I’m grooming them so one day they’ll leave me and be these awesome people that will create their own worlds for themselves.  I’m so looking forward to that for them but dreading it for me…  I just can’t imagine the day I put them to bed and they don’t cry for just ONE MORE HUG.

Alas… the day draws nearer whether I like it or not and I just hope that I won’t crumble into a ball of tears when it does.

Today though, today I get to break up fights over toys they have double of and patiently wait as they take 12 hours to chew one bite of food… and if they think I’m not keeping track of all this shit for when they have kids they can think again!

First – I need a shower… and I’m not doing it because Diem has been scolding me for a good hour now about it… I’m doing it because I want to.

Because I’m the boss.  Yeah… that’s it!