Tired as a Mother

IMG_8046.JPGAs I walked back to my car through the Target parking lot Sunday morning, in the rain, cold. Wet. Wineless.  Defeated.  I reflected, once again over the series of unfortunate events since Cori broke her leg.  I chuckled to myself as the icy drops rolled down my back, mixing with the sweat from my workout and cooling my sore muscles.  (They are unusually sore.  I must have had a great session!)  I had to hurry home to tend to Cori’s break out of eczema and ingrown toenail and mentally prepared for the deep clean my house was about to get since Daisy decided to turn the stove on while Chris and I were on our date night.  We don’t get those much, and this is why.


We had a great evening over some Mexican food and margaritas because momma ain’t fancy while our amazing friends/neighbors watched our children.  We laughed and talked like we haven’t been able to in a while and it was refreshing for us both.  Returning home to a house full of smoke and the smell of burnt pizza wasn’t QUITE the way we’d like to have ended our evening, but beggars can’t be choosers.  There wasn’t an ACTUAL fire, so I guess that’s the silver lining here.  And Chris didn’t kill Daisy, so that’s an added bonus.

Positive thoughts!

However, I’m still feeling bitter about the glass I shattered that held the last pour of wine from a bottle I liked a lot.  But I will, again, find the fun in all this mess and know that we can’t possibly be the only ones dealing with the crap-ton of bullshit that has been bestowed upon us over the last few months.

I sat at my newly cleaned kitchen counter,  trying to swallow my own dinner and begging my child to eat while counting down the hours until I could soak in a boiling hot bubble bath, sans wine which is the true tragedy in all of this.

But by Monday afternoon, I could lie to myself no longer as I held my tender eyelids open with my weak hands while sitting next to the toddler offering everything under the sun for her to just pee in the potty.  I think it’s cute that everyone else seems to have had such an easy go at this.  With their simple tips and tricks that they think I haven’t tried… or maybe tried incorrectly somehow.  Maybe my kid is broken or just stubborn AF… maybe both.  Maybe I’m just not good at momming, maybe I am. But low and behold, during all my self loathing – a trickle of pee.

Well not really a trickle… I’m being generous.  It was 2 drops… possibly 3 of pee.  We danced, we sang, we ate all the M&Ms, we ran outside to tell Daddy, who immediately joined in our celebration.  We watched with glee as she screamed from the center of the front yard, “I pee peed the potty!”

For just a moment, I forgot about the razor blades coating my throat and incredible drowsiness and rejoiced in this tiny glimpse of hope.

Until she unleashed in her pull up 20 minutes later.  All the joy came crashing down in immense disappointment.  She thought since she did it once, that was it.  And she could move on with life peeing and pooing all over herself without a care in the world.IMG_8030.JPG

And as much as I appreciate all of the ‘advice’ and just love hearing ‘she’s just not ready!’ It doesn’t change the fact that we paid the deposit at school and come Sept. 5… she’s got to be fully trained or no school.  And it took MONTHS for us to get her to even sit on the kid potty… so pee in the toddler potty is just one small hurdle in the marathon we are facing.  So if everyone thinks I’m overly obsessing over this… I’m not.  This isn’t one of those have-to-get-it-for-the-competition-of-mothers that we are all unknowingly in… because I really give no shits about that.  I just know how much she will love school.  She is desperate to make friends and she loves to learn… I hate to think that this is what is holding us back.

Plus I would love to save money on diapers and wipes at this point.  Shits expensive.

I can appreciate how incredibly talented and easy all of these other kids seem to be on Facebook and Instagram- however in this house… the potty is Satan.  For us all.  And as much as I know I will appreciate the strong willed child I have… I kinda just want to bang my face against a brick wall.

So after that loss.  I decided to just look at my throat – because why not.  And one glance with the flashlight on my iphone… yep… going to urgent care at 7:00 pm.

I have tonsillitis.  Awesome.

How my house, that has been cleaned more often and thoroughly in the last 2 weeks than ever can incubate any form of disease is beyond me.  Maybe I got it somewhere else.  But here I am… now on my own 10 day cycle of antibiotics with tortilla soup in the crockpot.  My only consolation prize.

But today is a new day.  And this is a new blog since I accidentally deleted the whole damn thing right before posting.

And here is a new recipe.

Fresh Chicken SaladScreen Shot 2017-03-05 at 2.08.12 PM.png

2 chicken breasts, sliced thin (to make 4 thin breasts)

1/2 tsp rosemary

1/2 tsp rubbed sage

1/2 tsp thyme

1/2 tsp salt

1/4 tsp pepper

1/2 tsp garlic powder

1/2 tsp onion powder

3 tbsp olive oil

2 cups kale, chopped (curly or Dino)

2 tbsp olive oil

sprinkle of cumin, chili powder, red pepper flakes, garlic powder, salt and oregano

1 roma tomato, diced

1 green bell pepper, diced

1/2 red onion, diced

1/4 – 1/3 cup of feta cheese

  1. Heat 3 tbsp olive oil in cast iron skillet.  Mix rosemary, sage, thyme, salt/pepper, garlic powder and onion powder and coat the chicken.
  2. Cook chicken on medium high heat, flipped every few minutes until there’s a nice little char on each side.
  3. Toss the kale in the oil and seasonings, add in the tomato, bell pepper, onion and cheese and top with the cut up chicken.